“Hi there! I’m Chip DeForsey for THE QUATRO, the Game Show Network’s fourth channel, and I’m here with Derek Bremer on his epic win tonight. Derek how long have you been playing Mario Kart?”

If you weren’t in Dinkmeyer Hall last night you missed a provocative musical experience. Contemporaneus Extraneus Musicus presented, as usual, a memorable mélange of pieces that have expanded the musical universe. The program was entitled “Beyond Nowness,” and it lived up to that extravagant promise as this reviewer found himself several times wishing for the future to arrive.

I am pleased to announce that we will be marking our seventh year of operation as a Burger Palace franchise with a gala Grand Opening celebration.  The Burger Palace corporate office has given us the long-awaited green light and has set its massive public relations wheels in motion. The big day will be November 12.  I’m sure we will all find this momentous occasion to be well worth the wait.

How do you zoo?

It’s easy.

Just follow these simple steps.

DISEMBODIED MALE VOICE:  “Hej! Thank you for calling the IKEA Hotline.  We’re here to help you assemble our fine pieces of furniture.  Sustainable living begins at IKEA.  For service in English press one.  Para instrucciones en español, oprima dos. för instruktioner på svenska, tryck tre.”