Looking ahead to conditions this week, there is a normal and natural cycle of heat waves in the South and Midwest as an undocumented surge of fronts moves across the US-Mexico border on Sunday, the holy day of the Sabbath.

On Monday, regions in the South will experience another series of northern atmospheric aggressions with cold fronts bringing thunderstorms, high winds, and oppressive government overreach. After an initial series of ineffectual left-leaning frontal bands passes through, a strong high-pressure system, conservatively estimated at 1029.3 millibars, will make the American weekend great again.

ANNA sits at the defendant’s table looking around uncertainly, wearing only her pajama shorts and her boyfriend’s t-shirt.

PROSECUTOR walks across the room, dropping off a paper at the JUDGE’S STAND. She looks similar to Anna except her hair is neatly brushed and she is wearing a professional suit.

THE STENOGRAPHER sits on the other side of the room across from the jury. She looks nearly identical to ANNA, wearing glasses and a skirt.

Beware the man who looks like he should be tossing tuna carcasses at the Fulton Fish Market, who calls himself a urologist, and is bearing a tube with a camera on it, headed for your penis …

“I’m not numb yet” I say, but he proceeds to ram the tube inside me. 

Apparently, a preposition is a bad word to end a sentence with. I don’t know if that’s a grammatical rule you’re obligated to adhere to. There seem to be so many examples in literature which this rule doesn’t apply in. Or to. I suspect this is the kind of “rule” like the “rule” of never using the split infinitive in English because it’s not permitted in Latin, a language that’s impossible to use it in.

“Where’s your IUD?” Dr. El-Taj asked.

“Somewhere in Florida,” I answered.

I think I left it behind a Burger King dumpster off U.S. 1, somewhere between Miami and Marathon Key.