Columns
Beware the Sensual Gay Agenda
Here are some activities for anti-gay politicians to do while avoiding their craving for gay sex!
Recent Posts
- “Forget the P’s and Q’s: Mind your C’s and K’s, A Cautionary Note for Prospective Parents,” by John S. Walters
- Wonderbroth
- “Rainbow Cookie Down,” by Maryann Aita
- Nice Eyeball, Eyeball
- “What We Learned From Honesty Day,” by Todd Mercer
- Buried, But Not Forgotten
- “Society’s Really Gone Downhill since the Apocalypse Happened,” by Daniel Galef
- Swipe Right As Fast As You Can
- “Full Disclosure: I Am a Russian Cyberbot Lurking on Your Social Media,” by Mike Fowler
- Geode Dude
Featured
Hey everyone! It’s one of my three favorite times of the year: the times I sit in front of my computer with a newly edited and formatted copy of Defenestration awaiting its release, my only job at that point being to write an editorial. And I never know what to write! I could claim that my perpetual writer’s block is due to the sheer number of these things I’ve been expected to create; 2018 marks the 15th year we’ve been doing this, and I’d much rather you read the short stories and poems instead of whatever I’m cobbling together here.
Welcome, welcome, to our latest issue of Defenestration, typically known as the “December Issue” but also known as the “Winter Issue” or “Defenestationmas.” The weather outside is changing, and then changing again, and then changing back into the thing it had originally changed into, confusing everyone and making their noses drip like cartoon faucets. But never fear! Defenestration is here to help keep the world company in these dark and sometime chilly times.
Sometimes these months (and even days) sneak up on you, but here we are: the August 2017 issue of Defenestration, the halfway point in our 14th volume, if you can believe it (you can’t). And what do we have for you? Another issue filled with the weird, the absurd, and the hilarious. We’re going to
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Prose
“Forget the P’s and Q’s: Mind your C’s and K’s, A Cautionary Note for Prospective Parents,” by John S. Walters I am a lifelong liberal of good standing, with impeccable credentials. On one issue, however, I am an unabashed Goldwater conservative. If there’s one thing that raises my ancient hackles, it’s whenever I see the names Cathy and Casey defiled with a K. Why do parents of the newborn err so egregiously? Why favor the fraudulent over the authentic, particularly in matters of enduring importance?
Ben & Winslow
Wonderbroth My wife an I eat a lot of pho. My wife is particularly obsessed with it, and we’ve got so many Vietnamese restaurants nearby that it’s really easy to grab some on the way home from work or school or the gas station or the grocery store or 7-11 or wherever else we might be. I don’t like to think about how much money we’ve spent on pho.
Eileen: This is Your Brain On…
Are YOU Irish Today? Let’s get ready to celebrate “Ireland’s Second Rate Saint Day!”
Jonathan: Mysteries Answered!… and Stuff.
Beware the Sensual Gay Agenda Here are some activities for anti-gay politicians to do while avoiding their craving for gay sex!
Chris: Encyclopedia Douchebag… ica
King Toadstool: Portrait of a Tyrant Koopa Kingdom isn’t an aggressive nation who wishes to destabilize the status quo because “that’s what bad guys do.” In fact, they’re a fledgling resistance, seeking to free all citizens of the world from under the iron fist of King Toadstool.
