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Defenestration: April 2018

Hey everyone! It’s one of my three favorite times of the year: the times I sit in front of my computer with a newly edited and formatted copy of Defenestration awaiting its release, my only job at that point being to write an editorial. And I never know what to write! I could claim that my perpetual writer’s block is due to the sheer number of these things I’ve been expected to create; 2018 marks the 15th year we’ve been doing this, and I’d much rather you read the short stories and poems instead of whatever I’m cobbling together here.

Defenestration: December 2017

Welcome, welcome, to our latest issue of Defenestration, typically known as the “December Issue” but also known as the “Winter Issue” or “Defenestationmas.” The weather outside is changing, and then changing again, and then changing back into the thing it had originally changed into, confusing everyone and making their noses drip like cartoon faucets. But never fear! Defenestration is here to help keep the world company in these dark and sometime chilly times.

Defenestration: August 2017

Sometimes these months (and even days) sneak up on you, but here we are: the August 2017 issue of Defenestration, the halfway point in our 14th volume, if you can believe it (you can’t). And what do we have for you? Another issue filled with the weird, the absurd, and the hilarious. We’re going to

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Prose

“Let Me Fix Your Language, Germany,” by Robert McGee

Learning German is hard. For an English speaker, it’s nearly impossible to figure out why pizza is feminine unless it is an object. “Die Pizza—feminine subject—schemeckt fine,” but, “Kann ich ein Stuck von der Pizza—masculine object—haben?” I would like to think this happens because Germans are progressive, but I know that’s not true. Part of me knows it would be easier to remember if it were the other way around—masculine things become feminine when they are objects—but I hate that part of myself.

Ben & Winslow

Cloud Cover

Sometimes you just want to draw characters with stormclouds for hair. And sometimes, when you do, you make a medical breakthrough. You’re welcome.

Eileen: This is Your Brain On…

Are YOU Irish Today?

Let’s get ready to celebrate “Ireland’s Second Rate Saint Day!”

Jonathan: Mysteries Answered!… and Stuff.

Beware the Sensual Gay Agenda

Here are some activities for anti-gay politicians to do while avoiding their craving for gay sex!

Chris: Encyclopedia Douchebag… ica

King Toadstool: Portrait of a Tyrant

Koopa Kingdom isn’t an aggressive nation who wishes to destabilize the status quo because “that’s what bad guys do.” In fact, they’re a fledgling resistance, seeking to free all citizens of the world from under the iron fist of King Toadstool.

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