In last month’s column, I attempted to describe the complexity (and utter banality) of the bromance. But now I worry that perhaps my example of Hollywood pretty boys, Ben Affleck and Matt Damon, didn’t quite normalize it as much as I had hoped. So, in continuation, here are a few more examples to make you feel either better or worse about yourselves. Enjoy!

Today we move away from the hedonistic world of gummi bears and into the cuter realm of child-inspired comics. “My birthday is in a submarine” is something my three-year old has been telling me for the past month, and I cannot for the life of me figure out what he’s talking about. I told him his birthday was in August, and he answered, “Yes. August is a submarine.”

Your guess is as good as mine, folks.

It has been twenty years since I led them, but I still know them all by name: aiming long rifle guy, grenade lobbing guy, lying flat sniper guy, kneeling bazooka guy, charging bayonet guy and machine gun aimed sideways guy. The sounds of their valor still echo in my dreams. The way they cheered for me, applauded my every decision. After the Great Bedroom War (1986-1987) and the Invasion of Cabbage Patch (Summer, 1988) I installed a suggestion box for my men. It is with great shame that I admit to only looking over these dispatches and communiqués now, almost twenty-five years later. I have failed my brave men, but hopefully their words will inspire and enliven this aging man they once so joyously called Ol’ General Radical.

Living as an adult, you quickly come to accept that your time really isn’t your own. A third of your day is spent at work and a third sleeping, giving you a measly 8 hours to do what you need to in a normal work week. In this present day world, if you even wish

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Ha! I do not even know, guys. I popped two gummi bears in my mouth the other day, and almost immediately, the dialogue for this strip magically appeared in my head. It was such a stupid idea that it made me laugh out loud, so I set aside the strip I had originally planned to draw for today and threw this one together instead.

I sometimes wonder what the hell is going on in Winslow’s mind, and then I remember that I’m the one putting those thoughts into his head in the first place….