It happens quickly. One minute you’re walking along Orchard Street asking yourself who casts these so-called “models” for American Apparel because they aren’t even remotely attrac—and bam! There he is, standing on the corner of Rivington.

All prior thoughts are inconsequential as you focus on one goal: find a hiding place. With the feline grace of a snow leopard you dive towards the first thing you see, a mailbox, and send a punk kid’s bagel soaring high into the air. Now there are two problems: the mailbox only covers you from the waist down and the punk kid is causing a commotion, demanding you pay for his smoked salmon and cream cheese bagel that he had only taken ONE BITE OUT OF. The number of bites is irrelevant you say which angers him more, so you thrust ten bucks into his sweaty hand and pray that the tall profile approaching your left retina isn’t who you think it is.

Another important rule for questing is having the right tool for the right job. Winslow is obviously some sort of fighter/warrior/berserker-type so axes are clearly going to be his thing. He has dozens in his collection, but I don’t think he’s ever come upon a monster so horrible that it required him to break out… Salma.

Dear (friend):

Do you love stickers? Don’t you wish you had more? How about bigger stickers? Or fuzzier ones? Are you one of those kids who has to earn stickers by doing menial chores around the house—like practicing piano, cleaning your room, or thanking your parents for almost everything they do? When did parents turn stickers from an innocent childhood pastime into a tool of extortion and bribery?

This is one thing that makes me smile. Despite the war on women, we are still a culture that is fascinated with tough old ladies. If art imitates and influences life, then one only needs to look to our novels, theater, movies and television shows to find examples of good old fashion female bad-asses. These

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One of the important rules of questing is assembling a competent group of companions. You need to have someone who can handle a sword or an axe, someone who can shoot well, someone who can disarm traps, someone who can wield magical powers, and someone with a bottle of medicine for healing boo-boos. Winslow’s a little short on friends, so for this adventure he’ll have to rely on Little Winslow and Kurt the Cynic. They will probably definitely be killed by a manticore.