Archive for June 2016

“Just a Few of the Many Functions of My Manly Watch,” Nicholas Roth

Jun 29th, 2016 | By

#13: Day / night indicator, indicates whether it is day or night in the vicinity where you are. You must first set dial “B” though, so that the watch knows which time zone you are in and dial “E” so that it knows whether or not your zone uses daylight savings time. One way to check whether you have correctly set dials “B” and “E” is by going outside and looking at the sky. You may also utilize a window looking toward the outdoors for this same purpose if one is available.



Nonplussed

Jun 24th, 2016 | By

Is it me, or has the term “plus-size model” been thrown around a lot recently? Usually in phrases like “Such-and-such magazine just put a plus-size model on its cover!” or “So-and-so just hired a plus-size model for such-and-such project!” I can’t tell whether the people involved are genuinely excited or just patting themselves on the back for being so modern and inclusive.



“Statement From PETA: Deplorable Conditions for Dinosaurs at Jurassic World, Especially the Thousands of Pterodactyls,” by Michael Jungman

Jun 22nd, 2016 | By

A giant shark-eating mosasaur kept in a lagoon like a gold fish in a bowl. A tyrannosaurus rex confined to a terrarium as if it were a mere iguana. Hundreds upon hundreds of pterodactyls crammed into an aviary like so many chickens at a factory farm. These are the deplorable conditions PETA found during an undercover investigation of the dinosaur exploiting theme park Jurassic World. And we cannot stress enough just how many pterodactyls were in that aviary.



Hair, Apparently

Jun 17th, 2016 | By

Hair is a rarity among males of whatever the heck species Ben and Winslow are supposed to be. You’ve no doubt noticed that all the men in these comics are totally bald, while the women enjoy hair of many colors and styles. It’s something that hasn’t sat well with Ben since the very earliest stages of this comic. I can’t say I blame the guy. Hair can be pretty awesome. Also, sometimes hair can be a monkey.



“Hogwartitarinism or The Harry Potter Era of World Letters,” by Kelly Kathleen Ferguson

Jun 15th, 2016 | By

During this time, all books were Harry Potter. There wasn’t a government edict or anything. It just happened over time. No one missed the dusting, although most people still owned real copies of the seven books. There’s just something about a real book.