I think it’s really easy for people to fall into bad spending habits. For example, I spend way too much money on tabletop gaming miniatures. I have so many of these things in my house that I’ll never have enough time to paint them all, let alone actually play games with them. I’ve tried to wean myself off this habit by buying board games instead, but now I’m spending way too much money on board games. Such is life.

Poop deck—where you walk about on the boat. The classic rude boating term.

Head—the toilet on a boat, and also a term for oral sex that Lou Reed thought rhymes with “head” (I know, it’s the same word!).

Abreast—when two boats lay together in a way the Bible probably frowns upon; a boob.

Cartoon characters wear the same clothes all the time because cartoonists are lazy and don’t feel like deviating from their drawing routine. I’ve doubled down on this laziness by making my characters’ clothes so integral to who they are that you wouldn’t be able to tell them apart if they suddenly started wearing other things. Do they have one outfit that they dutifully wash every night and change into the next morning? Do they have closets filled with identical clothes?

Dear feminists complaining about blue liquid in feminine hygiene commercials,

We accede to your demands and have heard your cries! No longer will we use blue liquid in tampon and pad commercials. Following the rupture of our respective eardrums after being nagged to death by the sound of your shrill voices, the men of Ladies’ Choice Feminine Care propose a peace offering.

There are about a thousand jokes that I could have used here, each of them more crass than the next. But my philosophy is this: I will always try to eschew the obvious joke for a more obscure but ultimately more satisfying one.