All entries by this author

Automated Teller Cyborg

Apr 6th, 2012 | By

The Automated Teller Cyborg (ATC) combines the convenience of an ATM with the customer support capabilities and friendly demeanor of the average underpaid bank teller. Money is easily accessible by swiping a valid bank card and pressing a few buttons. ATCs are also completely mobile, cheap to maintain (they like hamburgers), and capable of defending themselves from would-be robbers. They are the perfect blend of man and machine.

Until, of course, something goes terribly wrong.



“Semi-Hostile Thank You Notes for Every Occasion,” by Karen Gilmore

Apr 4th, 2012 | By

Thank You in Response to Condolences Offered

Dear Purveyor of Condolences,

Thank you for your gesture of condolence. I’m sure your heart was in the right place and if you think you did enough, I guess that’s all that matters.

Thanks again,

Mourner



I Got Myself A Poncho

Apr 3rd, 2012 | By

Recently, I forced my broke-ass to shop for some spring season deals. As a woman working in the corporate world, it’s important to look professional, and not look like a professional who gets offered money for “hugs.” This is a tough time of year for work appropriate wear. It’s too warm to wear wool slacks,

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Book Retort

Mar 30th, 2012 | By

With all the book-related news out there–Hunger Games doing well in theaters, the second season of Game of Thrones hitting HBO on Sunday, vampire sex being more popular than ever–I felt a powerful urge to do a book-related comic strip. So here it is. A book-related comic strip. If this doesn’t make you believe in the power of reading, I don’t know what will.



“Winning with Snotte ™,” by Mike Fowler

Mar 28th, 2012 | By

In the award-winning tradition of million-selling author Frank T. Snotte’s self-help guides, Winning with Snotte ™, Dr. Snotte and his team of in-demand motivational authors are proud to add five new titles to the Snotte catalogue, beginning with “Hum and Shrug for Success.” Our interviews with 150 fascinating people who have become successful and important

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