All of those guys are named Derrick.

Twelve is a hard age. At twelve you might equally make trouble by stealing a second helping of sugary cereal from the Shabbat morning breakfast buffet or by masturbating in your sleeping bag as your unsuspecting camp counselor leads a guided meditation. Jacob, the worst 12 year old I’ve ever known, showed me this during a three-week session at Camp Watahooga. “Hey bud, it’s not fair if you get more lucky charms when no one else does,” I told Jacob in the morning, and then later, “hey Bud, like we said before, you need to go to the all-gender single-use bathroom if you want to masturbate”–all this in the course of one terribly unrestful shabbat.

Ben and Winslow proudly present the first installment in what very well might be the only installment on their education series of comics.

I haven’t had sex with my wife in 270 days, and counting! And I’m proud to share that fact! Do you want to know WHY? Because I can’t make money or further my career when I’m having sex! My main goal is to be to most successful realtor in all of the Merrittville region, and sex can’t help me do that. Instead, I get pleasure and release from reading my trade records and watching money pour in from my Buyers, who I’ve convinced need to pour the entirety of their pitiful savings into a house that I convinced them that they need!