I’ve never drawn Ben and Winslow with bathing suits. The one time they were at the beach, it was for the fake movie poster of “Bikini Robot A-Go-Go!” and neither of them wore swim trunks. That’s not really fair, but Ben’s explanation is true. No one would know who was who! So today I’ve rectified that problem, with Winslow’s help. Sometimes the most obvious solution is also the most ridiculous.
SAUSALITO, CA – Like many Americans, Teresa Jasper reacted strongly to the Time magazine cover story that asks “Are You Mom Enough?” The cover shows a three-year old boy standing on a chair breastfeeding from his attractive mother. “Parenting is hard enough without being judged,” Jasper says as she hands her two-year old a juice box. “I’m supposed to feel guilty because I don’t want my kid kicking me all night?”
In last month’s column, I attempted to describe the complexity (and utter banality) of the bromance. But now I worry that perhaps my example of Hollywood pretty boys, Ben Affleck and Matt Damon, didn’t quite normalize it as much as I had hoped. So, in continuation, here are a few more examples to make you feel either better or worse about yourselves. Enjoy!
Today we move away from the hedonistic world of gummi bears and into the cuter realm of child-inspired comics. “My birthday is in a submarine” is something my three-year old has been telling me for the past month, and I cannot for the life of me figure out what he’s talking about. I told him his birthday was in August, and he answered, “Yes. August is a submarine.”
Your guess is as good as mine, folks.
It has been twenty years since I led them, but I still know them all by name: aiming long rifle guy, grenade lobbing guy, lying flat sniper guy, kneeling bazooka guy, charging bayonet guy and machine gun aimed sideways guy. The sounds of their valor still echo in my dreams. The way they cheered for me, applauded my every decision. After the Great Bedroom War (1986-1987) and the Invasion of Cabbage Patch (Summer, 1988) I installed a suggestion box for my men. It is with great shame that I admit to only looking over these dispatches and communiqués now, almost twenty-five years later. I have failed my brave men, but hopefully their words will inspire and enliven this aging man they once so joyously called Ol’ General Radical.