VI.X
Defenestration: August 2009
Welcome to the August 2009 issue of Defenestration, which is also our fantasy-themed issue. I’m pretty happy we were able to do this one; it’s one thing to be a magazine that publishes nothing but humor, but when you narrow the focus even further, you’re never quite sure what you’re going to get!
In this case, [...]
“Hellbend for Leather,” Jude-Marie Green
My business card reads “Russell Light, Impresario to Hell.” I hand it out to acts with potential and we do business at Flames Bar & Grill. I like the décor here: deep booths upholstered in maroon leather, flocked red velvet wallpaper, chromed barstools. Pete the bartender keeps the lighting low and moody. My clients like the [...]
“(S)tresses,” by Christi Krug
A high tower rose in the craggy wilderness, a vision in the night, a shadowy glove pointing at the sky with a bony, accusing finger. Like that, or a guy with really bad arthritis.
Closer, one could see figures. Two figures. One figure with a figure, and one that was shaped more like a splinter. It [...]
“Wednesday’s Promenade,” by Mary Baader Kaley
A wizzard, a bird, a pig.
On a stroll yesterday with Henry and Fredrick, I told Fredrick, my parrot, to be sure to straighten his language a bit. His profanity was altogether embarrassing, though many marveled at his flair – – he could verbally outfox anyone with his erudite vocabulary peppered with competently placed cursing. He [...]
“Reverse Metamorphosis,” by Bill Waters
One morning, when Gregor Samsa woke from troubled dreams, he found himself transformed in his bed into a horrible insect.
–Franz Kafka, “The Metamorphosis”
One night, when Grgrsmszzz woke from troubled dreams, he found himself transformed in his sleeping place into a horrible human the size of a bug–life inside the kitchen wall would never be the [...]
“The Demihumans Three Meet Their Match,” by Christopher Jacobsmeyer
The trio of adventurers walked down the woodland path, still an hour away from their scheduled stop at The Screaming Wench. They were looking forward to tankards of Nexik’s best.
They called themselves the Demihumans Three: Wild Weasel (halfling thief), Agnon (dwarven cleric), and Yerond (elven fighter). They were in a good mood, having just successfully [...]
“Displaced Nobility,” by Errid Farland
They named Elzbieta after her mother, the great and not always unkind Queen Elzbieta Blackwell. Her Majesty had taken an inspection tour of the battlements atop the north facing tower one fine summer morning when she suddenly was not. The guards who accompanied her brandished their swords, looked at one another, looked through the portals [...]
“Moon Pies and Dime Whistles,” by s. smith
The wind was a constant, a dry, gritty west wind that in winter ranted and wailed across the prairie like a madwoman on roller skates. In the dead of summer it was almost always a sighing, an incoherent but incessant babble.
There was madness, Mrs. R. thought, in that wind and in the empty horizon. Madness [...]
“Elvis the Dragon Slayer,” by Glen Batchelor
Elvis watched the sun flash from the blade of his sword as he removed the dragon’s blood. It was his fourth killing this year and he was becoming bored. Not only he but the king’s subjects were becoming bored. He was no longer a hero but merely a workaday knight doing a job. He dropped [...]
Two Poems by Ann Howells
WOLF RESPONDS TO REVIEWS OF AN OFF-BROADWAY PRODUCTION OF RED
RIDING HOOD
It’s ridiculous, an actor of my stature
appearing off-Broadway, but they lost their lead-
mugging or something-just prior to opening. My name
lends credence to a new company, new production.
We do that in theater. My name is synonymous
with the role, you know; I’ve [...]
