Posts Tagged ‘ Eric K. Auld ’

“Thank You For Choosing Amtrak. My Wife Just Left Me.” by Eric K. Auld

Apr 2nd, 2014 | By

Hello, hello, hello, folks! Hope you’re all swell on this brisk winter evening. This is the Amtrak 449 Lake Shore Limited train from Boston, Massachusetts to Chicago, Illinois. My name is Phil, and my wife just left me.

“Lesser Known Literary Cocktails,” by Eric K. Auld

Aug 20th, 2013 | By

The Waiting for Godot: Place two ice cubes in an empty tumbler. Watch them melt as nothing else happens. Wait until morning. Repeat.

The Wasteland: Pour everything you have into the largest glass you’ve got. Hand it all over to Ezra Pound and watch him change everything. Garnish with footnotes.

“Northwestern Ohio: A Retrospective,” by Eric K. Auld

May 25th, 2013 | By

For your Sunday enjoyment… Ohio!

“The Doritos Guy,” by Eric K. Auld

Apr 20th, 2012 | By

Somebody told me
the Doritos guy
died recently.

Although I wasn’t
at hearing this news,
a sadness overcame me,
one that leaves
a crumbling, artificial
powdered-cheese sensation
in my throat,
with bags of guilt to follow.

“Excerpts from The New Anthology of American Product Placement Poetry,” by Eric K. Auld

Mar 14th, 2012 | By

so much depends

a red Radio

glazed with Aqua-

beside the white
Chicken McNuggets®