Normally Winslow would ask Little Winslow for medical advice, but since Dr. Spiderqueen is Ben’s doctor and Ben seems to be the one dying this week, Winslow felt it was only appropriate to stick with the physician that has the appropriate medical files on hand instead of a drawer filled with printed photographs of things he found when sneaking into the offices of legitimate doctors after hours. Or something.

The apathetic pre-adolescent child’s tendency towards whining and boredom when required to participate in a family vacation event has been documented by child psychologists. One method of entertaining a child who prefers video games to outside activity was tested on a 10-year-old male subject. The subject was given a slice of Italian bread and instructed to offer it to a flock of laughing gulls in order observe the length of time he would interact with the birds and if he would have a positive reaction, thereby indicating amusement and providing his parents with an extended period of time devoid of disgruntled complaints during which they might dilute their emotional fatigue with an inhibition-lowering ethyl alcohol.

I think it’s really easy for people to fall into bad spending habits. For example, I spend way too much money on tabletop gaming miniatures. I have so many of these things in my house that I’ll never have enough time to paint them all, let alone actually play games with them. I’ve tried to wean myself off this habit by buying board games instead, but now I’m spending way too much money on board games. Such is life.

Poop deck—where you walk about on the boat. The classic rude boating term.

Head—the toilet on a boat, and also a term for oral sex that Lou Reed thought rhymes with “head” (I know, it’s the same word!).

Abreast—when two boats lay together in a way the Bible probably frowns upon; a boob.

Cartoon characters wear the same clothes all the time because cartoonists are lazy and don’t feel like deviating from their drawing routine. I’ve doubled down on this laziness by making my characters’ clothes so integral to who they are that you wouldn’t be able to tell them apart if they suddenly started wearing other things. Do they have one outfit that they dutifully wash every night and change into the next morning? Do they have closets filled with identical clothes?