So today’s comic is all about ninjas, but I don’t know whether Winslow, Kurt, and Reya have gone back in time to feudal Japan or if they’re sneaking around a modern Japanese castle or what. Does it matter? No.
Ben & Winslow
Pssst… if you want a good deal on arms, I can get you in touch with Winslow. He’s got all sorts of arms for sale. Small arms. Large arms. Wobbly arms? Yes, even wobbly arms.
This comic has all the things you were hoping to see today. Ben. Winslow. Tight-fitting costumes. Goblins. Babies. References to movies from the 80s. For you, my fans, I deliver.
Winslow puts up this sign at every party he’s ever thrown. It gives him a way to claim whatever gets left behind without resorting to the ridiculous lost-and-found box Ben keeps in the hall closet next to the large Tupperware bin full of craft supplies. Winslow has amassed quite a collection of abandoned items: watches, jewelry, cell phones, underpants.
I don’t even know why Ben would ask Winslow this kind of question. Of course Winslow’s ready for the party. He’s ready for every party. He’s had lots of practice partying with attractive women and famous celebrities. I would have mentioned some of those celebrities, but the last time I did that one of the celebrities died a week and a half later. Seriously. (Sorry, Meshach Taylor.)
Here’s another “movie preview” comic for your enjoyment. Ben & Winslow Studios has been producing quality entertainment for the silver screen for years, starting with the horror classic Cartoon Zombie Freakout in 2009. Following its overwhelming commercial success both domestically and overseas, Ben & Winslow studios produced a number of other notable films: Ninja Apocalypse Fandango (2010); Bikini Robot A-Go-Go! (2011); Giant Radioactive Kaiju Sandwich Armageddon (2013); and Epic, Vaguely Medieval Showdown (2014). After a 2-year hiatus, the studio has returned with this sci-fi action adventure, proving that you haven’t really run out of ideas until you’ve done a story about time travel.
Normally Winslow would ask Little Winslow for medical advice, but since Dr. Spiderqueen is Ben’s doctor and Ben seems to be the one dying this week, Winslow felt it was only appropriate to stick with the physician that has the appropriate medical files on hand instead of a drawer filled with printed photographs of things he found when sneaking into the offices of legitimate doctors after hours. Or something.
I think it’s really easy for people to fall into bad spending habits. For example, I spend way too much money on tabletop gaming miniatures. I have so many of these things in my house that I’ll never have enough time to paint them all, let alone actually play games with them. I’ve tried to wean myself off this habit by buying board games instead, but now I’m spending way too much money on board games. Such is life.
Cartoon characters wear the same clothes all the time because cartoonists are lazy and don’t feel like deviating from their drawing routine. I’ve doubled down on this laziness by making my characters’ clothes so integral to who they are that you wouldn’t be able to tell them apart if they suddenly started wearing other things. Do they have one outfit that they dutifully wash every night and change into the next morning? Do they have closets filled with identical clothes?
There are about a thousand jokes that I could have used here, each of them more crass than the next. But my philosophy is this: I will always try to eschew the obvious joke for a more obscure but ultimately more satisfying one.