Applicant information.

1. Name:

2. Suggested nickname for future use by alarmed local reporters and inept local law enforcement:

3. What, in your opinion, were the three most fucked up things that happened to you in early childhood?

Hello Calypso customer. Thank you for your recent order. This e-mail confirms the receipt of your order for “The Game of Thrones” box set. You will be contacted when your order is ready for shipping.

Washingtonians, this Wednesday afternoon, come to the Starbucks on 1600 K Street to become acquainted with some young, interesting, average income level Asian American guys and gals. Instead of meeting Asian American doctors, lawyers, and consultants, you’ll meet Dr. Dre copycats, alcoholic paralegals, and T-Mobile wireless salespeople.

Have you noticed an influx of fashionistas in your neighborhood? These newcomers are intriguing, and you’d like to inspect up close those unisex infinity scarves. You’ve already snatched a few strangers off of their research vessel/vacation dock. You might have been raised by alligators or gestated in a nuclear cooling pool, but you recognize something special when you see it.

Part I: Pregnancy

The Good Housekeeping illustrated book of pregnancy and baby care.

The Madness of King George [videorecording]

Toys to Knit

Dark Autumn [videorecording]

Chariots of Fire [videorecording]