In the near future, I will be taking a trip to Canada, a mystical land filled with meese and rhetorical questions. Seeing as how I haven’t traveled abroad since Karl Malone got his shorts in a twist when he found out he’d have to share the same space as Magic Johnson, my passport has long
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Another Christmas has come and gone, and, much like everyone in my life who I thought loved me, has left me, leaving me an even more bitter and cynical man than I was the year before. There are certain things I’ll just never understand about the whole Christmas phenomenon; I get the history of it,
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Dear FedEx Field Parking Attendant (or whatever nonsensical title they made up to make you feel good about yourself): On October 17th, a group of friends and I headed down to FedEx Field before the Redskins/Colts game to partake in a little tailgating, as most attending football games do. We arrived fairly early, and proceeded
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Being able to make efficient use of my time and energy (or being lazy, whichever), I’m not fond of doing anything that involves: A) Me leaving my cave, B) Having to expend any extra energy on my part. So, when I do have to venture into the outside world, I have a set list of
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Football (REAL football, not this soccer nonsense), a sport enjoyed by Americans the world over. A game where it’s not only allowed, but encouraged to knock the crap out of people much smaller than you. A sport that has a holiday dedicated to it, where the main course consists of various meats covered with various
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