Prose

“What Women in Science are Really Wearing These Days (Contrary to What Most ‘Women in STEM’ Posters Would Have You Believe Are Always Lab Coats) OR Things That I Have Actually Worn as an Actual Scientist Doing Actual Science,” by Sarah Totton

Sep 10th, 2019 | By

1. Steel-toed rubber boots. Because nothing says “Thank god!” more than not breaking a toe as a cloven hoof stamps on your foot when you’re ankle-deep in cow manure.



“Single Pink Grapefruit Seeking Trampoline for Out-of-This-World Adventure,” by Julie Willis

Sep 4th, 2019 | By

If you’d asked me before I had kids whether I would want kids with imagination or “normal” kids, I’d have said imaginative kids. Who wouldn’t?



“The New Yak Tomes Bust Sellers,” by Tom Ukinski

Aug 28th, 2019 | By

1. Game of Phones, by Sprobile Verizatt

2. Don’t They Know It’s All Their Fault?: Cutting the Ballast from America’s Rise, by Malwasse Wright

3. What the Monkey Thought, by Pitter Patterson



“IKEA Even Sells Cheap, Do-It-Yourself Metaphors For What To Do With Your Drunken Sailor,” by Mars Schupsky

Aug 20th, 2019 | By

I woke up in the water, well below the surface but still in the light. When I breached, I gasped and looked for safety. He was floating not too far from me, leg up on the back of the IKEA couch, his hand in a bag of chips, passed out. Even as I swam over to him, calling his name, he didn’t wake up; not until I almost tipped the thing climbing on.



“Kids These Days,” by Benjamin Davis

Aug 20th, 2019 | By

I look behind her into the hut. Warm air flows out.

“I uh, saw the smoke.”

“Yes, it’s fine, I’m trying to cook some children.”