There is no exact comparison to the anticipatory joy and adventure that comes with a visit to Hi’s Variety.

Despite the world of Amazon, and internet, we sometimes find ourselves with a need in the now, and without clear thought as to how “this thing” can be quickly procured. Be it a rubber gasket to retard the flow of the faucet stripped midstream in a botched DIY plumbing attempt, or the fat leather watchband from the 70s to perfectly accentuate the evening’s themed disco masquerade. A box of Stove Top stuffing is essential for one’s solo Thanksgiving, a 45-rpm record adaptor for the amateur DJ who left his at home. The proper adhesive to reattach our rear view mirror, and an army-man Battle of the Bulge playset to decorate the cake. Make no mistake, we’ll find all these treasures and so much more at Hi’s.

1. Someone begs you to come. 

2. As soon as you arrive, you realize this was a big mistake.

“The hook,” I tell my creative writing students, “is the secret of getting read.” Unfortunately, powerful first-line hooks were nonexistent before the mid-1950s. This is probably why few readers willingly pick up a book published before that decade. Let me illustrate with examples of how once-famous novels could have been saved by inserting a commanding hook.

During King Charles’ historic coronation ceremony, all eyes were on the head that wears the crown and, more precisely, on that head’s Pantone Cool Gray #1-coloured tresses. Longtime hair-haver Charles III joins a proud lineage of British King Charleses, all of whom had more majestic hairstyles than the newly crowned sovereign.

It’s never too late to be a great Renaissance artist. Yes, the original Renaissance was a long time ago, but it’s making a comeback. Renaissance? So retro. R-squared, baby.