“A Recipe in Eleven Easy Steps,” by Linda Sanchez

Jan 22nd, 2025 | By | Category: Nonfiction, Prose

When making a curry dish, I usually start with red curry paste and a can of coconut milk and build the flavors from there. The other day at Trader Joe’s, I saw a mob gathered around a display of yellow curry simmer sauce. People were grabbing jars like they were puppies during a pandemic. So, I said to myself, don’t be such a snob, just try it.

Here’s the recipe I came up with. I think you’ll like this dish; it’s as tasty as its name is alliterative.

Cauliflower Cashew Carrot Curry

1. Put about a tablespoon of coconut oil in a saucepan and let it get good and hot. Be sure to watch it in the pan as it starts to bubble. What’s more fun than coconut oil when it comes to solids becoming liquids?

2. Add one head of cauliflower cut into florets. Be sure to fully activate any OCD you might have and use it to create florets of uniform size and shape. Alternatively, chop the whole head, stem and all, into unwieldy chunks with a very big knife. You’ll know what to do.

3. Get that cauliflower all up in that coconut oil until every bit of it is coated and says to you, “Now we’re talking.”

4. This is the time to add one whole coarsely chopped onion. If you tear up while chopping the onion, remember to reuse and recycle. You’re crying anyway. Why not consider the losses you’ve sustained over the years? Or relive your magnificent victories? In a pinch, I recommend imagining the breathtaking eulogy and exuberant mourning at your own very well-attended funeral.

5. Let the onion and cauliflower make sweet love in the pan until they are both sated.

6. Now add a big handful of unsalted whole cashews. Now add another handful. Now, think to yourself, is there any reason on earth not to put more cashews into this dish? Think about it seriously. I beg you. And if you can’t come up with a reason not to, go ahead and add another whole handful of cashews.

7. Add some carrots, maybe two or three, peeled and sliced lengthwise and cut in half. Cut extra carrots if you’ve got dogs. They’ll flash you a disappointed look, but they’ll take them just the same.

8. Now stir up all of that yumminess and let the coconut oil tell its sweet story into the ears of all the tender veggies until they fall into a soft and gentle slumber together.

9. Now add a jar of Trader Joe’s Yellow Curry Simmer Sauce. Plop.

10. Blend and simmer for a while, enough time to do one fun and engaging—but shortish—activity. Be 92% invested in this activity, but be sure to reserve 8% of your engagement for listening to the voices of the soup, and tending to your own interest in its development.

11. It’s almost time to serve. It’s a big moment. Sprinkle with a handful of golden raisins and a generous snipping of fresh cilantro leaves and give it all one last stir. Enjoy!

Notes:

1. Wearing an apron while cooking will always increase your joy by 26% to 38%, and wearing one while making this curry is no exception. The apron will help create a nostalgic and warm feeling throughout the experience. It also might feed the idea that you’re working at something. You’re on the job. A professional. I recommend it.

2. On Golden Raisins: This dish can likely be made without golden raisins, but you can also experience autumn without foliage or a gin and tonic without lime. Trust me on the golden raisins.

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Linda Sanchez is a tantalizing mix of efficiency and whimsy, as adept at creating spreadsheets as she is at flirting with wildflowers. She draws inspiration from house spiders and highway debris. When not writing, she conducts howling concertos for neighborhood dogs and puts her spices in alphabetical order. Linda lives in relative obscurity with her husband and beloved dogs, most often in a state of bliss.

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