Prose

“Have You Seen Waldo?” By Rod Parker

Jul 20th, 2009 | By

My name is Rod. I’m an Assistant Manager at a fast food restaurant, and worked there for nearly five years. I’m a natural study of human nature. Thus, I find this place interesting. Or rather, more accurately, I find the occasional parade of characters sometimes curious, disturbing, and amusing. Curious: I have a regular who

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“Six Warning Signs of a Troubled Relationship,” by Greg Gerke

Jun 20th, 2009 | By

SIX WARNING SIGNS OF A TROUBLED RELATIONSHIP (REMEDIES INCLUDED) By Shiva Lila, M.A., ASCAP 1. The Locks Are Changed Nearly Every Time You Return Home This has happened to three friends of mine. Ironically they were all born in Pittsburgh and strangely enough they are all women. On the bright side you can know this

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“In Praise of Zombies,” by Jon Alan Carroll

Jun 20th, 2009 | By

Zombies never sigh. Or roll their eyes. Zombies are never hurt by a rejection from Ploughshares. Not even the third one. Unlike certain right-wing commentators, zombies do not deeply admire their own courage. Zombies never direct movies about beautiful young people learning important lessons about life and love. Zombies are not, as Neal Cassady would

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“The Webster Letters,” by Dietrich Kalteis

Jun 20th, 2009 | By

Dear Mr. Webster: Let me start by saying it is certainly not my intent to appear brazen, or to burden you, rather to humbly draw your attention, purely out of duty, to a grave and considerable error I found in your ninth edition. Although I do not recall why I delved into my volume, that

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“The Private Life of Obama’s Speechwriter,” by Samuel K.

Jun 20th, 2009 | By

The secret life of Jon Favreau, the President’s wordsmith wunderkind. 9:05 a.m. — Breakfast at the White House. WAITER: More coffee? JON: Thank you, thank you very much. I dine here today, humbled by the task before us, grateful for the breakfast you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by the White House kitchen

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