1. Before submitting, please get an idea of what we tend to publish by, you know, READING OUR MAGAZINE. And not just one issue, but several of them. It is disheartening, not to mention anxiety-inducing, for our editors to receive manuscripts from writers who clearly do not know much about us.

This is how Winslow has spent every snow day since 1995. And let his diligence be a message to the rest of you: If you’re ever unhappy with your body, build yourself a surrogate out of snow.

1. A robot must not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm. 2. A robot must obey any orders given to it by a human being, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law. 3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does

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Are children getting dumber or am I getting smarter? I may not be the best person to answer this. Last time I had a babysitting job, I was almost inspired to start a career directing snuff films. And let’s face it, kids are really fucking stupid. They spend the first few years of their life

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I felt a powerful need to draw this when I found out the smurflions from Avatar had sex with their hair. Because, you know. They have sex. With their hair.