1. “I Didn’t Reject You; You Weren’t Even Eligible To Apply In The First Place,” Says Lesbian To Straight Man

2. “I Can’t Keep Doing This—I’ve Tried Them ALL!” Says Woman Of Dating Apps And SSRIs, Ghosted By Both Singles And Serotonin

3. So Close, Buddy! Congress Accidentally Passes Bill to Fix Everything, Panics, Then Immediately Vetoes Itself

4. “I Can Do Friends With Benefits, Just Not Benefits Without Friends,” Says Woman To Fling Who’s Neither Friendly Nor Beneficial

5. “You’re Right. I Do Need a Reality Check,” Says Woman Invoicing America For The Cost Of Being Conscious In 2025

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Emma McNamara is a 23-year-old writer and special educator from Hopkinton, Massachusetts. Her work has appeared in publications including Scholastic Art & Writing, Ember—A Journal of Luminous Things, Wild Roof Journal, Defenestration—A Literary Magazine Dedicated To Humor, and Tech Directions. She is on the editorial board of Beyond Queer Words and is passionate about mental health awareness, disability advocacy, and LGBTQ+ issues.