Prose V.VII
“URGENT AND CONFIDENTIAL BULLETIN: New Guidelines for what to do if you encounter a UFO,” by Mike Romeling
As we all know, UFO is short for Undead Ferocious Otters. You may see them in many places but usually not in beauty parlors. In fact, many women frequent beauty parlors primarily to reduce their risk of encountering Undead Ferocious Otters and to smoke cigarettes. Nobody bothers you about smoking when you’ve got curlers sticking [...]
“New Jersey Slogans,” by Alison Burke
Coming to a Tourism Ad Near You! 1. New Jersey: Finally a state that looks up to West Virginia. 2. New Jersey: Home of the famous wife beaters and beaten wives. 3. New Jersey: The skid mark in America’s underpants. 4. New Jersey: Because A**hole was deemed inappropriate. 5. New Jersey: Best described by Tony [...]
“Movie Reviews” by Megan Amram
GONE WITH THE WIND This movie was OK, but it was no 300. Seriously, have you seen 300? That movie had such cool special effects and action scenes. I’m a very masculine guy, but I’m not afraid to admit that some of the love scenes in 300 made me cry, and also some of the [...]
“Deer Tales,” by Ken Brosky
I’m at a bar and I’m supposed to be trying to figure out what to do with my life, but instead I’m hunting deer. Bucks. Some of them hide behind the trees and some of them come running out into the clearing from the edges of the screen. I’m pumping the little plastic rifle as [...]
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