Defenestration

Three Poems by Emily Severance

Sharp As A Tack

Self help insult books are on the rise
Since researchers discovered
the severely critical remain
sharp as a tack into old age;
alzheimers thwarted
with withering stares.

“An Honest Love Poem,” by Adam Gianforcaro

I hear these pop stars
are falling in love,
stumbling blind for
chic gowns
and ballroom brides,

“The Secret of Andy’s Success,” by Jim Bennett

I am Andy Garcia’s conjoined twin.
(Yes, that Andy Garcia. The actor.)
A ghost you could call me, I suppose,
Wikipedia calls me the “dead parasitic twin on his left shoulder.”
How would you like that for your epitaph?

“Zoo Ghazal,” by Holly Jensen

In Australia, Huntsman spiders kill in cars. One sees a spider the size of a
child’s hand rush across the dash, one exits the road at freefall. (Clever girl.)

“Scrotum Humanum,” by Jennifer Clark

In 1676, because
he did not doubt
the greatness of
man, Robert Plot

mistook that which
remained—the knee

“Facts About Mosquitoes,” by Ross Walton

The average lifespan of a mosquito is between three days and one hundred years, although it is reported that one mosquito will never die. This is referred to as the Alpha Mosquito and is held in high regard by certain tribes in North Africa.

“How To Be A Member,” by Christina M. Rau

Sign something in blood,
Anyone’s blood,
Using a colonial quill.

“On Being Born May 19th,” by James Valvis

What a joy to be born on this fabulous day, May 19th,
the same birthday as Pol Pot,
whose name doesn’t sound evil, more like something
you might make for dinner on a busy night.

“Just Because a Rabbit Isn’t Chocolate…” by F. John Sharp

I’ve set a trap for the Easter
bunny, made of carrot
flavored jelly beans

“Famous Last Words,” by Paul Giles

SHIRT: “The first hanging is also the last.”

BED: “Tiredness: the little death.”

PILLOW: “Once bitten, twice shy.”