Good morning or possibly afternoon (or night)! Welcome to the April 2017 issue of Defenestration! And if I’m here welcoming you to a new issue, that also means I’m sitting at my computer the night before this issue goes live, wondering what the heck I should be writing about for my editorial. I mean, I could tell you about all the stuff you get to read this month, which may or may not include clown removal, jabberwockies, interesting clothes, dead bodies, ballet, and a bear named Doug. I could tell you about that stuff, but you should probably just read it for yourself. Follow the links below and be entertained.
Actually, I do have editor-related information to share with you before you leave. Are you ready?
The political landscape in the United States and elsewhere is pretty nuts right now. Politicians have always said stupid things, but it seems like they’re saying stupid things all the time. (One politician in particular. We won’t name names here because he seems to thrive on the attention).
I know it can be tempting to write a scathing or satirical piece about these things, but please, think twice before sending that kind of stuff to Defenestration. It’s not that we don’t like making fun of politics, but you guys have been sending us really topical stuff. Like, as soon as [insert politician here] says or does something stupid, you crank out an Onion-style article and send it in. Which is great (thanks for thinking of us), but we’ve got stuff scheduled several months in advance, and your article won’t be funny several months from now. It probably won’t be funny three days from now. Because those same politicians will say or do something stupid tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that. We want humor that will be funny no matter when it’s read, not humor with an extremely limited shelf life.
Anyway, just wanted to clear that up. :)
Now get to reading! And now that we’re once again open to short story and poetry submissions, send those our way!
—Andrew Kaye, Editor-in-Chief
Kevin Sterne, “Clown R&R”
Kay Bevan, “Here Lies Ennis MacDonald”
Jennie Byrne, “Out of Town”
L. Soviero, “Now that you’ve seen me in my gimp suit, there are some things I want to talk to you about”
Chris Connell, “From Doug the Bear with Love”
C.B. Auder, “We Cannot Become What we Need to be by Remaining What we Are”