The December 2010 issue Defenestration is here. And by “here,” I literally mean here. As in right here. Or at least several lines below here, which is just as good. Or so I’m told.

This holiday season (Christmas, Hanukah or one of its various alternate spellings, Kwanzaa, Festivus, the 13th Feast of Shub Niggurath, Saint Radagast’s Day, and so on), give your friends and family the gift of Defenestration. This month’s issue is so good that you will feel compelled to print it off, wrap it up in fancy paper, and give it to everyone you know. Because the best kind of gift is the kind that’s easy on your wallet, and Defenestration is free, free, free.

The average lifespan of a mosquito is between three days and one hundred years, although it is reported that one mosquito will never die. This is referred to as the Alpha Mosquito and is held in high regard by certain tribes in North Africa.

Sign something in blood,
Anyone’s blood,
Using a colonial quill.

What a joy to be born on this fabulous day, May 19th,
the same birthday as Pol Pot,
whose name doesn’t sound evil, more like something
you might make for dinner on a busy night.

I’ve set a trap for the Easter
bunny, made of carrot
flavored jelly beans