Whenever I hear chefs or cooking enthusiasts or members of the Recipe Card Guild talk about ingredients, I can’t help but think they’re making things up. They could do it, too, and no one would be the wiser. Even other chefs. It’s probably an unspoken rule among chefs that they aren’t supposed to call one another out on made up herbs and spices.

Just because something’s cute doesn’t mean it should get free bread. Like baby ducks. Those jackasses need to get their own damn bread. Earn it like the rest of us.

WARNING: Today’s comic contains images of a blurry penis in a jar. If you’re offended by blurry penises in jars, you probably shouldn’t look at today’s comic. If you’re at work, you also probably shouldn’t look at today’s comic, unless you’re a urologist and penises are part of the job.

Today we’re going to get a little bit artsy and a little bit philosophical. What is art, friends? Is it an abstract rendition of emotions otherwise impossible to convey in mundane shapes and colors? Is it a painting done with such skill that it borders on photorealism? Is it a photograph in a tasteful frame, possibly in black-and-white, or at the very least some sort of sepia shade, making it look like it was taken in cowboy times?

Today’s comic was directly influenced by my son, who has been in full-on Star Wars mode for the last few weeks. “Lemon Greason” sounds like a name a three-year old would come up with because a three-year old DID come up with it. As far as I know, Lemon Greason is the first original character he’s come up with.