I.
In bed, back propped up against
two pillows wearing your alma
mater sweatshirt.

I have no truck
with planning ahead, and thus
from a frosted upstairs window
watch my forlorn Mini Cooper disappear
beneath a white shroud
(and who knows
what the kid next door will charge
to dig it out)
a larger concern is the wind–
well, not the wind

Villagers swarm the police station
there’s a marijuana issue across town,
a marijuana issue!
Folks are unlawfully getting stoned!
Chief soars out smelling like the finest indo
don’t worry people; we will solve it, carry on!
Please carry on!

Let us now praise famous men:
Praise is wholesome, by and large—
you know they need it now and then
because they’re famous, because they’re men.

I guess there wasn’t a way
this wouldn’t have happened

when I show up late
to a party where everyone
has done shots since midafternoon