“Volumes in Superfluity: A catalogue of overstock academic titles, discretely priced,” by Mark Gallini

Aug 30th, 2023 | By | Category: Fake Nonfiction, Prose

Prone: In Praise of Lethargy

Campbell Somerville, Michaels College Press, 2011, 275 pps. (paper)

Written over the course of thirty years and still unfinished at his death in 2010, hermetic Professor Somerville’s pensées on the value of inaction were found in his university apartment along with his partially decomposed body.

“An unbelievable find” — David Larsen, Michaelstown Fire Chief. Only $9.95

Ancient Itches, Modern Scratches: the Ubiquity of Pthirus Pubis

Landon Sourise, Apologia Press, 2009, 120 pps. (paper).

Part historical survey and part rationalization, this book is compendium on the common pubic louse throughout the ages and a personal apology from the author to his family and a series of his students during a time of stress, confusion and uncertainty.

Originally $14.95, now $5.95

Like Others Before Me: Teacher-Student Transgressions from Aristotle to the Present

Landon Sourise, Apologia Press, 2011, 200 pps. (paper + DVD apology per court order)

Professor Sourise follows up on his Ancient Itches with another survey/rationalization. In it he harkens back to the golden age of education or at least less correct times.

$5.95

SPECIAL TWO-BOOK DEAL: GET BOTH SOURISE WORKS FOR $7.95 PLUS SHIPPING. ORDER TWO SETS AND GET A THIRD ONE FREE.

Ulysses: Stasis and Epimorphosis

Daphne Lippinzaner, Bateman College Press, 2008, 3250 pps. (paper)

We don’t know what it means either, but for $1.00, (cover price $49.99!) you’ll find some use for its precise 6.25” thickness. Call for shipping prices.

Stacking Two Dots: the Ubiquity of the Colon in Academic Titles

Alan Freedman, Davenport College Press, 2006, 350 pps. (paper)

An intriguing treatise on the semantics and punctuation of Academic writing. Originally $16.95, now $2.95

Be Like Bonobos: A Proposal for Remaking Human Society 

Shoshanna Beacon, Oregon Alternative Press, 2010, 65 pps (recycled paper)

In this slim treatise, a plea to her adult children, a fifty-year-old woman recalls the ruins of her married life and makes a case for our society to emulate that of Pan Paniscus, the matriarchal, hypersexualized, pygmy chimpanzee of the Congo Basin.

Dissected Till Plains: a Paean to Eastern Nebraska

Ira Levy, Buffett College Press, 2008, 90 pps. (paper)

A 36-year-old, nontenured professor from the Big Apple expounds on his adopted home in this plaintive tract, the publication of which will allow him to remain there, with job security, a lighter teaching load and hopefully his own office. $3.95

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Mark Gallini has published fiction, humor, journalism, and a haiku(!), and has co-cowritten an indy film and optioned a TV pilot. He lives in Philadelphia.

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