Well, well, well, what have we here? Has another issue of beloved humor magazine Defenestration crawled ashore to lay its eggs? I think it has!
I think Eileen would agree with me that editing this magazine has, on the whole, been an immensely positive experience. We get to read a lot of fiction, nonfiction, and poetry–most of it never before published, and some never before seen by another magazine or editor. That’s a cool experience. A humbling one, certainly. And it’s one of the things I love about editing Defenestration.
But the world can’t be sausages and rainbows all the time. Eileen and I like to joke on Twitter about the negative aspect about running a literary magazine: angry response letters. Obviously, we read way more stuff than we actually publish, so not everything we see is going to get an acceptance letter in the mail. But guys*? If we reject your submission, don’t take it personally. It isn’t an attack on you. It isn’t even an attack on your submission**. So don’t send us back a snarky response. Don’t curse at us or call us names. Don’t belittle the things we’ve already published. And don’t do these things and then send another submission to us a few months later. Because even if you sent us solid gold, you won’t get in. Seriously, I don’t know anyone that can hold a grudge like Eileen. It’s like white-hot fire. It’s the only thing that keeps us warm in the winter months.
Anyway… enough about that. What can you expect this month? Monsters, certainly, both the undead and the maternal. Strange creatures, too, human and otherwise. And food. And elections. And an island full of kickboxers. So read on! And if you like what you see and want to contribute, we’re now open to short story and poetry submissions for our August 2016 issue.
See you then.
—Andrew Kaye, Editor-in-Chief
*We have never received an angry response from a woman.
**Okay, this is only partially true. If you send us something openly offensive, your rejection is totally an attack on your submission
Poetry
Matt Dennison, Two Poems
Anna Della Zazzera, “Yours in undead desperation (a zombie soliloquy)”
Bob Schildgen, “Food Policy”
Maria Bonsanti, “Debating the Draft”
Short Stories
Christina Dalcher, “Teratology 101: A Handbook for New Mothers in the Monster Age”
Kathryn Paulsen, “Pitch Meeting: Election 2020: Running Mates”
Lindsay A. Chudzik, “Pinning”
Han Adcock, “The Day That Went Hobnaciously”
Doug Cornett, “This Is Probably Not The Right Time To Tell My Wife About My Awesome Movie Idea
Emily Buckler, “Former African Despot Mobutu Sese Seko is a Subway Conductor on the 6 Train”
Downloadable Copy