“The Secret of Andy’s Success,” by Jim Bennett

Apr 20th, 2011 | By | Category: Poetry

I am Andy Garcia’s conjoined twin.
(Yes, that Andy Garcia. The actor.)
A ghost you could call me, I suppose,
Wikipedia calls me the “dead parasitic twin on his left shoulder.”
How would you like that for your epitaph?

They surgically removed me at Hospital Clínico Quirúrgico.
Oh, Havana.
They burned me to powder in a medical waste incinerator.
Oh, Havana.
But I never really left.
I haunt him.
I do!

Brother Andy, you see, well,
He went on to hit it big
No incinerator for him, no sir.
Did you see The Godfather, Part III?
Oscar nomination!

We were once two parts of the same person.
Today he claims to have no memory of me.
Don’t you believe that.
Not for a white-hot second.

You know that thousand-mile stare he has?
That faraway look? Those deep breaths and heavy sighs?
Sure you do.
That’s what happens when you’re haunted by your dead, excised Siamese twin.
You do stuff like that, stuff that looks great on camera,
And the next thing you know,
Coppola is saying, “Perfect!”
You’re on your way.

Still, my very best work ended up on the cutting room floor.

Jim Bennett blogs at thebloviatinghammerhead.wordpress.com and familymediadetox.com. He lives in rural Illinois.

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