Posts Tagged ‘ christopher eatman ’

Should’ve Listened to Geoffrey

May 19th, 2014 | By

Adulthood is that monster under your bed you were scared of as a kid, and your only defense was pulling the sheets up over your head, only now the “sheets” are–well, still sheets, as staying in bed all day is amazing and the threat of eviction isn’t that intimidating.

Just Prop ‘im Up in the Corner

Jul 23rd, 2013 | By

During the course of our lives, we’re introduced to the people who make up the world around us. From birth, we get to know and love our family, and, if our personality isn’t that of a curmudgeonly old man, we’re lucky enough to find friends whom we care deeply for. These relationships grow and blossom for years to come, but those who you’ve trusted to not poison your meals will inevitably succumb to death.

The Summer of 32,000ft

Jun 17th, 2013 | By

Airplanes and prisons are the two places where it’s absolutely impossible to escape from an unwanted situation.


Mar 18th, 2013 | By

With it now being the third month into President Obama’s second term, quite a few debates regarding legislation has sprung up. There’s the ever popular “Defense of Marriage Act,” this whole second amendment hullabaloo, women’s rights when it comes to the development of a parasite in their body, drone attacks on American civilians, I’m sure there’s more, but you can only watch so much C-Span before you think to yourself “This would be a lot more interesting if Vince McMahon were Speaker….”

Out with the Old and Take the New with You

Feb 18th, 2013 | By

With every New Year comes a new promise that we make to ourselves to get better. We vow that we’re going to finally get in shape, that we’ll take the time to show our loved ones we care, that we’ll start seeing the world or spend less time at work, and all that self-improvement hogwash you tell yourself year in and year out.

SWF Princess ISO Italian SWM

Nov 19th, 2012 | By

Recently, on a gaming news site that’s been irrelevant for months, a story was posted about how a young lass who was seeking companionship through one of the many online dating services felt that while she identified herself as a gamer, stated she needed to keep the fact a secret (why this site is irrelevant to gaming). Her reasoning? She wanted a potential suitor to see her as something more than a person who’s extremely adept at handling a joystick (yay double entendres!) So, in an online environment, where many of the users are socially awkward, and trying to find some way to establish a rapport with someone, she opted to leave out nearly 90% of what guys could easily connect with her on. Which led me to one, very simple truth which is this woman, is simply not a gamer.

Just Say ‘No’ to Nov. 6

Oct 22nd, 2012 | By

To this very day, I STILL don’t understand why “Dubya” was even compared to Hitler. In his entire eight years as president, not ONCE did the man even attempt to grow a mustache.


Apr 23rd, 2012 | By

Recently I celebrated the 29th anniversary of my birth, and my mother took it upon herself to to embarrass me at work. So, the day before my birthday, a family friend/co-worker wheels a giant SpongeBob cake back to my cube and proceeds to sing “Happy Birthday” loudly and off-key (bless her heart). Clearly, my mother

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Mar 20th, 2012 | By

All of us wish to, in some way shape, or form, differentiate ourselves from the other common rabble out there. We develop our own unique style, from the clothes we wear, to the unnecessary tattoos of Looney Tune characters or car company decals that are strategically placed in inappropriate areas. We spent so much of

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Do I Look Like Dr. Phil?

Feb 21st, 2012 | By

I understand that in order to exist in a society of laws and other such nonsense, that I’m not allowed to flat out smack people I don’t feel like dealing with, an inconvenience I just have to live up to. What I will not accept is having to engage in idle chit-chat because people find

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