Defenestration

Dear Santa…

Being turned down by attractive celebrities is how sociopaths are made. At least in the cartoon world. Winslow is very likely to start kidnapping princesses next. That’s just how these things go down.

Dear Ms. Hayek…

Now that Winslow has won a sizable (if undefined) amount of money with a winning lottery ticket, it’s time to spend it! Money in the hands of Winslow is a potential danger. He’s just as likely to spend it on ham sandwiches, night vision goggles, and girlie mags as he is on stolen antiquities and doomsday devices. The option depicted here is a more responsible choice: hiring Salma Hayek to star in a movie is an investment, really. Just think of the money he could make with this thing!

Lottereyes

Sometimes I wish human facial expressions had the elasticity of cartoon characters. No one would be able to hide their real feelings. And if anyone won the lottery, everyone would no without smug announcements of sudden wealth.

Turkeybits

Since it’s the day after Thanksgiving and I didn’t feel like putting up a Thanksgiving-themed comic up yesterday, here’s a turkey-themed comic. Because people cook turkeys on days other than Thanksgiving, right? And you probably have some cold turkey leftover from yesterday, right? So turkey’s still fresh in your mind? Maybe even in a sandwich?

The Winslow in the Hat

Obviously this comic is based on the Dr. Seuss book The Cat in the Hat Comes Back. My son is obsessed with it at the moment, and he insists I read it to him twice–sometimes thrice–in one day. I don’t mind, of course. I always liked The Cat in the Hat Comes Back more than its predecessor, The Cat in the Hat. Something about an alphabet’s worth of doppelganger cats in a matryoshka of hats is awesome.

Bikini Robot A-Go-Go!

This fake movie preview is the natural bridge between the cheesy science fiction movies of the 50s and the so-called “beach party” movies of the early 60s. It has robots! It has bikinis! It has robots wearing bikinis! And since no beach party movie is really a beach party movie without Annette Funicello… it has her, too. Albeit in cartoon form.

Walkies, Drinkies, Talkies

The leash laws in Winslow’s town are very specific. Dogs like George are free to wander the streets without a leash, so long as one or more of their owners are nearby. Abnormally-small-people-not-to-be-confused-with-children-or-dwarves (a term the local law books call ASPNTBCWCODs) are supposed to be leashed whenever they’re outdoors. This law was made specifically for Little Winslow, who is a known biter.

Inspired Carvings

Happy (almost) Halloween!

Winslow gets a little carried away sometimes. But only sometimes.

A Flavor Most Diabolical

I’m not a coffee drinker. Never grew accustomed to the flavor. So my interactions with Starbucks and other coffee shops have been limited. My wife, however, introduced me to frappuccinos, which come in non-coffee varieties and, to my delight, also come in a variety of flavors not listed on the menu. Andes Mint frappuccino? Hell yeah. Those things are freaking amazing.

Cloaca Free

Bad joke time! I apologize for nothing!

I learned something new while working on this strip. I looked up “virgin eggs” to see if the term really existed, and was horrified by the answer.