Legless Horse

Photograph By Matt Fletcher

Text By Top Defenestration Scientists

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Amateur nature photographer Matt Fletcher recently sent us this rare image of Equus immobilus, or, as it is known in more vulgar terms, the “legless” or “weird as hell” horse. Known for its cigar-shaped body and tendency to float mysteriously in place while it grazes on tufts of grass, the legless horse has been sighted sporadically across the continental United States, as well as Great Britain and the Iberian and Arabian peninsulas.

“The horse wasn’t born without legs and the amazing ability to hover,” says Mr. Fletcher, who is clearly lying in order to protect the amazing creature from poachers. “I edited it in PhotoShop.” Always one to stay true to his lies, Mr. Fletcher added, “It was originally a stock photo from deviantART. I’m pretty happy with the results.”

We, the highly educated scientists on the Defenestration staff, have been hard at work trying to locate Mr. Fletcher’s discovery. The potential to learn more about this animal, such as how it hovers, its excretory habits, and how in God’s name it mates, was too good an opportunity to pass up.

Finding the horse was problematic. Finding Matt Fletcher wasn’t. After hours of brutal interrogation, Mr. Fletcher told us, choking back tears, “His name’s Henry, and he likes hugs.” We’ll give you more information as we discover it. Stay tuned to Defenestration.

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Matt says: “'Lo, my name's Matt Fletcher and I'm 15 (nearly 16) and from England. My pastimes involve sipping tea, watching cricket, and saying "Tally Ho!" When I'm not doing that, I enjoy messing about with PotatoChop- cutting up pictures of animals, sticking them to other animals, removing things, adding things, messing about with things; you get the picture. I also like to do web design, my site being http://www.naiveamoeba.co.uk , and my webcomic being http://a.1asphost.com/pixelpuss/ . But of course, I also like other things, like my guitar, TV, curry, and whipping fat children with sticks.”