Defenestration

Defenestration: April 2010

The wait is over. Welcome to the April 2010 issue of Defenestration!

We changed this year. New look. New format. We’ve been publishing columns, comics, and non-fiction all year, but now it’s time for the poetry and prose to explode from our virtual pages. This is the first of three Defenestration issues that will appear this year, and it’s excellent. We recieved a lot of great submissions during our first reading period, and we chose the best of the best.

Two Poems by David W. Landrum

It is here you’ll stay.
I have to donate you—
and don’t lay blame: you were the one
who became a relic, galumphed
into the dismal swamp of old desire.
You are a specimen, so don’t insist
you aren’t exotic.

Two Poems by Steve De France

Sitting in her garden
I resolve to reflect a positive life outlook.
I begin a spiritually affirming list poem.
I like fish swimming in a pond.
Birds are good—they sing a bit.
Ducks are decorative but dumb.

Two Poems by Danny Adams

Othello (Moor), Iago (scorned)
go at it in a Turkish war
but poor Othello doesn’t know
Iago’s out to get him so

“Downy Nights,” by Laura Garrison

The dreams
webbed and flapping, with beaks like orange shoehorns,
suffuse my head;

“Film 401 – Robotic Pitfalls in Contemporary Cinema,” by Gabe Durham

Week 1 – The Matrix

One thing my EATR students have over the 19-year-olds I used to teach: attention span. I flipped the lights on after the movie and all 400 of them were alert, humming softly, their eyes glowing red with what I’m told is attention.

I began with what I thought was a softball question: “What did the robots do wrong in this film?”

“My Favorite Thing,” by Phoebe Nir

“The thing is,” I said, “I’m pretty sure I’m overreacting.”

“Maybe,” said the mailman.

“No, but really,” I said. “Like, I’m almost certain that I’m overreacting.”

“An Infinite Amount of Monkeys,” by Josh Peterson

When the monkeys showed up at my door with a card that read, “An infinite amount of monkeys—For Dean,” my brain spun in my head like a rotisserie chicken. If there was such a thing as an infinite amount of monkeys, then every home, dance club, nursing home, pizza joint, ocean and planetoid would be filled with monkeys. In fact, logically, the monkeys should inhabit the very spot where I stood. I grabbed the card, worried that the infinite monkeys would rapidly deplete our resources and their decaying carcasses would litter our streets.

“Rebranding Thor,” by Mark A. Rayner

“We’re thrilled to have your account, but I’m afraid your numbers are down since our initial chat.”

“You’re kiddin’ me.”

“I’m afraid not, and I don’t want to sugar-coat it,” the lead consultant said. “We always get our best results when we start with an honest appraisal of the landscape.” She switched the projector on, and started her presentation: “according to our research, belief in you is down to less than a fraction of one percent.”

“City Hall,” by Chris Tarry

Assuming that love actually did take place—that love between two City Hall employees (one from Sewage and Disposable Income Studies, the other from the much-less-heralded Bikes and Bike Rack Division), was indeed a manifestation of actual love, of real love, of throw-your-arms-around-it-and-cry kind of love, and not a by-product of lonely-office, interdepartmental ballyhoo (or flirting, as it’s commonly known)—then the current variables, social media studies, and other weights and measures can be correctly applied. That is, of course, assuming one takes into consideration the length of the courtship, the male’s intent when initiating said courtship, and the female’s acceptance of awkward and uncomfortable silences surrounding said attempt. See also: The Water Cooler And Its Socioeconomic Ramifications.