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Further Translations from the Corporate
By Jon Alan Carroll
____________________
In Our Company, We Admire Focus and Drive.
We
don't practice them, we just admire them.
Innovation Is Our Real Business.
Change
is bad and could wake up the whole staff.
Quality First!
Just
after the convenience of our employees.
Four Generations of Quality.
Pretending
to Care...Since 1925.
Without Our Customers, We'd Have No Reason to Exist.
Customers
are our least important interruption.
The Customer Is Always Right.
Not
only are our customers frequently wrong, they are usually insane. And ugly, too.
Perfection Is the Goal, But We Settle for Excellence.
Our
only question: Is this going to require effort or expense?
We Are the Industry's Thought Leaders.
There's
nothing more tedious than thinking. We prefer video solitaire.
Our Employees Are One of Our Most Important Assets.
Not
at these wages, pal.
____________________
Jon Alan Carroll is smarter than he looks,
or so he claims.
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