Fake Nonfiction

“Get Published in Six Easy Steps!” by Amy L. Bernstein

Feb 3rd, 2021 | By

Have you always yearned to become a published author, but didn’t know where to begin? Great news! There’s never been a better time to make your dreams come true. Follow these six simple steps in my popular Think System, and you’ll be adding ‘author’ to your résumé in no time.

“The Arbiter of Notability,” by Greg Landgraf

Jan 27th, 2021 | By

I swear, Googling myself was an act of laziness rather than ego. I’d accepted but not started a new job, and I needed to find out my exact title. (Is it marketing and communications coordinator, or communications and marketing? That’s the kind of thing a communications and marketing coordinator, or even a marketing and communications coordinator, should get right.) I could have found the offer letter in my email, but my inbox looks like Jane Austen’s rage room, and my new employer had hinted that they might be making a public announcement, so I thought an online search might be the way to go.

“What Goes Unsaid,” by Alexei Kalinchuk

Jan 20th, 2021 | By

The elephant in the room wants more attention than we are willing to give, and frankly, if five guys out of a proverb want to come over and fondle him in the dark while hypothesizing as to the beast’s identity, they are welcome. I’m sick of our pachyderm. Have been for over a year, if truth be told.

“Our Turbo Model… Now With Advanced Mulching Capability,” by Jill Witty

Jan 6th, 2021 | By

My Dad likes to say he had a Ferrari, once. But it wasn’t actually a Ferrari. It wasn’t even a car.

“A comedian’s performance rider,” by Danny Rathbun

Dec 16th, 2020 | By

It’s a tough world out there for artists who are just starting out; producers are always ready to take advantage of young artists and try to cheat them out of pay, or force them to work in unsafe conditions, and it can be very difficult to speak up for yourself when you feel you’ve been wronged.