Jonathan: Mysteries Answered!… and Stuff.

Beware the Sensual Gay Agenda

Mar 26th, 2018 | By

Here are some activities for anti-gay politicians to do while avoiding their craving for gay sex!



SEXY GOP CALENDAR

Dec 28th, 2017 | By

Presenting the proposed Sexy GOP 2018 Calendar and our star pin-ups!



Expletives in a Glass

Mar 20th, 2017 | By

I’ve compiled a few recipes for your drinking pleasure over the next unbearable four (eight?) years.



Defenestration’s Schedule of Classes

Oct 17th, 2016 | By

We here at the Defenestration Inner Council want to let you youngins know that we believe you are unique individuals with so much potential ahead of you. Alas, as we discovered ourselves, the world does not agree. Prepare to be categorized and labeled (oftentimes inappropriately) for the rest of your lives!



Merry Christmas, Crazies! (A Serious Myers–Briggs Study)

Dec 21st, 2015 | By

After careful analysis, I am able to gift you all with an assessment of your own Christmas holiday behavior based on your Meyers-Briggs personality type.



Please Love Me, Mary Gaitskill

Jul 13th, 2015 | By

I met Mary Gaitskill once, and only once, which stands to be one of the most memorable and embarrassing evenings of my life.



Fair Trade The HARD Way (Not Really)

Mar 23rd, 2015 | By

Hope does not taste good. I guess coffee is best when it is bitter and brewed with human suffering and unfairness.



D&D Soup at 165 Eaton Place

Dec 18th, 2014 | By

What could a classic British TV series like Upstairs Downstairs and Dungeons & Dragons have in common?



Dangerous Hipster Boys in Trouble (Or Not)

Sep 29th, 2014 | By

Defenestration Magazine is proud to announce the forthcoming publication of columnist Jonathan Harper’s debut collection of short stories in March 2015 … we think.



Recipes for your Literary Dinner Party

May 27th, 2014 | By

1st Course: Hors D’oeurve   Wells Tower’s Salmon Cutlets, Ravaged and Burned Ingredients:  1 salmon filet, 2 tablespoons olive oil, 2 cloves garlic, fresh dill, 2 lemons, salt, male angst, Viking helmet Put on your Viking helmet. Savagely cut salmon filet into long strips and then mercilessly mince garlic cloves and shred dill. Adjust your

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