All entries by this author

“Why Can’t I Find Pants That Look Good Unzipped?” by Jeff Ward

Sep 12th, 2018 | By

Here’s a hard truth about destroying the future. There’s no guidebook. You’ve got your gut, and that’s it.

Hey, my eyes are UP HERE.



Fill in the Blanks

Sep 7th, 2018 | By

We’re going to to something a little different today. This comic doesn’t have any words but it does have speech bubbles, which means you have an opportunity to fill in the blanks. Think of it as a Ben & Winslow activity page. Feel free to print this out and write something in crayon.



“How Following the Weight Watchers Diet Turned Me into a Ring Wraith,” by David Elliott

Sep 5th, 2018 | By

A few years ago, I decided that I might need to lose a few pounds.

It was the little things, really; lack of energy, clothes that didn’t fit anymore, excessive perspiration, the fact that I hadn’t seen my penis since 1973. I thought that joining Weight Watchers would be the most sensible way of going about this, that I could lose weight in a steady, controlled manner, in a friendly environment, surrounded by like-minded people who would support and encourage me throughout the entire process.



Slice and Dice

Aug 31st, 2018 | By

Frankly, I’m ashamed that I find this so amusing.



“Diary of a Facebook Parent Group Post,” By Kristen Hansen Brakeman

Aug 29th, 2018 | By

Hi CCHS parents! It’s Sheila Rasmusen, new PTA president.
The Varsity Football fundraiser is this Saturday!



You Should Have Gone for the Head

Aug 24th, 2018 | By

My mind is a dreamscape the likes of which you cannot comprehend.



“Diner Booth Abandoned, Voiceovers of the Unexplained,” by Alexei Kalinchuk

Aug 22nd, 2018 | By

Grains of salt. Wadded napkins. A scent of slivered fried potatoes in the air. This former site of dining, this leatherette monument to food-based fellowship remains desolate. But clearly someone dined here.



Defenestration: August 2018

Aug 20th, 2018 | By

It’s August, and that means Defenestration!

You see this little guy? He’s popped up in the header this month as well. Just trying some new things to spice up the place a little bit. Remember the building we had up there the past several years? Eileen always hated it, so she told me to change it or she’d make my life miserable.



“Fish Out of Water,” by James Dupree

Aug 20th, 2018 | By

There’s a fish on my desk and it’s weirding me out. It’s just sitting there. Where did this thing come from? How could it have possibly gotten on my desk? The damn thing isn’t even cooked! It’s not baked, or sautéed, or pan fried, or pan broiled, or grilled, or poached, or deep fried, or prepared in any way that would be beneficial to me. It’s just raw, and not in a creative or delicious way, like sushi. Raw!



“Resistentialism,” by Brooke Boveri

Aug 20th, 2018 | By

It started when Walt’s wife, Eve, left him. After she moved out, there was nobody around to push it back under the desk. Walt had never understood the importance of pushing it back under the desk. While Eve did so religiously, one of its first thoughts was that she had probably not understood the importance of that, either. All she wanted was a tidy room and to stop falling over it. Even though Walt rarely sat in it, he had an inexplicable tendency to leave it out of its place. Another one of its first thoughts was how much it would miss tripping Eve.