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When in doubt, start your own company. If you’re of a particularly violent mindset, such as Winslow, perhaps becoming a contractor for the U.S. Department of Defense is the job for you. After all “security contractor” is just another name for “mercenary” in these more polite, politically correct times.

The apple pieger was one of Winslow’s more successful creations. It’s has the perfect balance of speed and ferocity. Cherry piegers tend to be smaller and lazier, whereas pumpkin piegers, while noticeably larger and with a thicker pie tin, are also much slower. Rhubarb piegers are mentally unstable, whereas early experiments with an entirely different species of pie-based deterrent, the ball piethon, resulted in something similar to last week’s comic.

Ben forgets that Winslow invented the pie laser years ago.

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Andrew Kaye (known in some circles as AK) is the creator of Ben & Winslow and other questionable comics, many of which can be found in his deviantART gallery. He’s also the editor-in-chief of this magazine. Duh?